The Devil In Me

You should always approach a match against the second best team in La Liga with a fair amount of caution. But it pays to know that last season was one of the weakest in that competition’s history, with champions Real Madrid losing 9 games from the start of the year alone. United are looking a touch dicey at the moment and small mercy it may be, but I am glad this game is being played at Old Trafford. 

Our record at home in Europe is very, very strong (hang on a second, isn’t that what you said about our record against Liverpool?)(SHUT UP!) and the team hasn’t put two poor performances together since, well, since the last two games they played.

Also, Berbatov appears to be injured, Spartacus is only just returning from injury and volleyball Scholes is suspended. This bears all of the hallmarks of an upset (that means us losing) but for some reason I think we are going to win. Why? Because it is Europe, and that is surely the reason Fergie is still there.

Or perhaps there is something in my coffee.

The goatee beard arrived at the press conference and was followed in by Rafael Benitez. The beard announced that Torres and Gerard had both come through ‘light training’ and would be in the squad tomorrow. As far as smokescreens go I am sure that the organisers of the latest Kylie Minogue concert are quaking in their boots.

Having just spoken to my ‘friend’, a man more scouse than a twelve stretch for stealing the hubcaps off a glue sniffing factory, I can inform you that the watch grabbers are quietly confident, if for no other reason than it is about time. Being a superstitious old fool I have similar thoughts but never mind.
To the team sheet!

VDS
(Anelka)

Wes Rio Vidic Evra
(Not Gary yet) (Lets hope the back is okay) (Veni, vidi) (Groundsmen)

Hargreaves
(90 minutes please)

Nani Scholes Giggs
(new Ronaldo) (volleyball) (Chest wig)

Rooney
(articulate)

Berbatov
(goalscorer?)

The last two trips to Anfield have been very stressful affairs. Even those with the longest fingernails in the business were unable to play guitar for several months afterwards. Our on-paper record against Benitez-pool makes for some enjoyable reading, apparently their most prolific marksmen against United in recent years has been one John O’Shea, and we have recorded enough 1-0 victories to make an Italian World Cup Campaign drool with envy. That reading though, does not tell the full story. Even the most generous fans would admit we were more than pleased to drive home with three points from the last two; some may even go as far as saying we were lucky. So why, dear God why, do I feel more confident about this trip than the ones in the recent past? 

Despite Liverpool currently occupying top-spot and their usual, pre-season ‘this year we’re gonna do it wac’ posturing, I think that they don’t believe it.  I think that every scouser is secretly cringing inside at the thought of this fixture. Their two great hopes, $tevie Mbe and Torres, are both crocked and they simply don’t have the confidence to win without them. Their farcical board situation means that everybody secretly know Benitez could be out of a job at any moment, and, of course, Carragher has chosen this week of all others to release his addition to that most worthy of fields, the footballer’s autobiography. “The owners are destabalising the club!” He wails in those poetic pages. Yes Jamie, but your book is doing nothing of the sort. 

Unusually for a man with a goatee beard Benitez strikes me as a man of pride. He will want to improve his record against us and he has such experience at fluking qualification from the Champions League Group Stages that he may not even worry too much about Tuesday’s game. Fergie always thinks ahead to the European games, always. Benitez could start with half-fit Gerrard and half-fit Torres, which may or may not help them, but Sir Alex may also field Fletcher and O’Shea. It will be difficult to guess the teams in advance but surely the strongest we have got should beat them.

The players returning from the England set-up should do so with a spring in their step, that would include people like Rooney and Ferdinand but again, tellingly, not Gerrard. Tevez will want to to put in the kind of performance that reminds his international selectors he is good for something other than earning red cards (he has got two in his last three Argentina matches).  There is also the matter of Dimitar Berbatov’s, hopefully, inevitable debut. The stage is set then, the crowning of a new forward maestro and the early season crushing of Liverpool’s title hopes too. I feel so confident about this I have even arranged to watch the game with a Liverpool fan. The only problem is, it just doesn’t work that way does it?

I have a horrible feeling that Fergie will start with Gary Neville, who I am certain is not yet match sharp. I also think that he might go for a cagier formation when, at the moment, Liverpool are there for the taking. Capello’s England decided to go for it this week and it worked out for them, if we adopt the same approach we could record a famous victory. But maybe Fergie, like me, has had a look at his fingers and thought he might want to strum some kum-by-ah over the coming weeks. The result will be on the team sheets for this one.

They say that the three most stressful things you can do in life are move house, get married and have children. ‘They’ have obviously never been fervent United fans. Thedevilinme himself is moving house shortly and the stresses of that pale in comparison to waiting for this final.

It is important to note that United have not really played 4-4-2 all season, more 4-5-Rooney in fact, so when second guessing the team selection we should probably not have that formation in mind. Despite the return of Gary and Silvestre from injury I still think that we should go with the same back four as we’ve had all season. It is the front six where picking things becomes tricky.

For that part of the equation it becomes necessary to have a look at Chleski’s areas of strength. In my humble opinion, the way to beat Chelsea is to keep Drogba and Ballack quiet, harrass Terry and keep an eye on Joe Cole. So which players are going to do that then?

Jono has made the excellent point about Hargreaves’ familiarity with Ballack, and I agree that they should start opposite each other, we have no other player who understands the German’s bag o tricks better than him. Vidic is probably the only defender in the world tough enough to keep Drogba chained up and, provided he doesn’t get hospitalised by the bloke again, I think he can do it.

Rooney and Ronaldo should be up to the task of giving the Chelsea back four a hard time. That really is where we will either win or lose the match, whether they score is crucial, obviously. Wesley, keep an eye on Cole, you train opposite each other for England, you know what he’s up to.

So what else do we need in the team? Class, quite simply, and cool heads, I think Scholes (the already picked) fits in to that category and the only other dilemma is whether to go for Giggs or Anderson? The answer is (drum roll please…) Anderson, because Giggs and Nani are better impact players from the bench.

And so the team is…

VDS

WES RIO VIDIC EVRA

OWEN SCHOLES

RONALDO ANDERSON CARRICK

ROONEY

Bench: Giggs, Nani, Silvestre, Fletcher, Mark Payne

Anyway I must dash, getting married this afternoon, nearly forgot.

Bobby Robson was once asked what the secret was to good management during his time with Barcelona. He replied simply “Pick the best players and play them in their preferred positions.” It does sound simple doesn’t it? But the reality is that with teams challenging for trophies everywhere and injuries cropping up that we are now in a position of having the best squads winning the major prizes. It is, however, the best team that generally wins football matches and now United fans have only two to concentrate on it is something of a worry that the best team is still not known.

It is fair to assume that Ferguson will pick the team against Wigan that he would like to play against Chelsea in Moscow, both matches are of crucial importance and are spread out in such a way that overtiring the players need not be a matter for too much concern. What is of concern is that Ferguson has gone on record as saying that he would ‘pick Paul Scholes on sentiment’ and backed up the claim since. With Giggs just one, or two, games away from Bobby Charlton’s record does this mean he will be picked using the same criteria? United are without a shadow of a doubt a club that does things the right way, always providing tickets for ex-players and commemorating them appropriately with testimonials but these things happen, crucially, after the players have retired. The man who dropped Jim Leighton for the 1990 FA Cup Final replay was a man interested in winning. The first match in that encounter with Crystal Palace was a six goal belter. The replay was a dour, stodgy match indeed but it did bring home the trophy. There is often talk about playing the Manchester United way and whilst I wholeheartedly endorse this, we need to play the team that is going to win the game.

Wes Brown should start at right back and Evra at left back. Vidic, VDS and Rio pick themselves.The forward six should be Scholes, Ronaldo, Rooney, Tevez, Hargreaves Anderson. Simple. Yet I have a nagging thought that Fergie might get the jitters and try a new tactical formation that doesn’t work. I see Ronaldo playing as an out an out striker for example.

Thoughts?