The Devil In Me

Tis a strange season this one. As little as three weeks ago I was sure we would peter out around March. Lacking in motivation, goal threat and a Happy Ronaldo we have been far less imperious than you would expect European champions to be. But, whisper it quietly, we may just be getting away with our lack of early-season form.

This is the kind of result that makes you believe. Sunderland’s back four were excellent, all eleven of them played with great tenacity and deserve tremendous credit for equipping themselves so well. United, on the other hand, tried to play football. We have struggled to score at the best of times this season but, (post- Eric 95/96) we all know the value of the 1-0 win and at some point we are going to start seriously hammering people.

Tevez has every right to be miffed at not starting, my proposed solution to our current “too many jedis not enough lightsabres” problem is start Ronaldo on the bench. It was another Saturday when he looked unhappy and behaved in a way it is hard to explain. He is saying the right things to the press but usually with Ferguson sat five yards away, a la the Ballon d’Or presentation this week. He is utterly, utterly wonderful as a player but he is starting to remind me Ruud in 05/06. We all know what happened next.

Keano:

Having spoken to a few of the Mackems, whom I find to be fairly decent fans, there didn’t seem to be that many of them unhappy about his departure. “Tactically naive” was a phrase I heard on several occasions. Perhaps these guys don’t quite appreciate how close they were to a Leeds-esque decline. Not that he would ever come, but I would be extremely happy to see the big man back as part of our coaching set-up.

United were less convincing than we have been led to believe. We certainly came out of the blocks fast and Rafael is a delight at the moment but we are still a little edgy at the back. City played as many bobbling high balls into our box as they could and goals could have been conceded on a couple of occasions. It felt great to get a win again in this fixture and we need to go on a run now.

I have no idea what Ronaldo was doing either. We need to get behind him though; he is still our player after all.

It was a cracking game of football but we were horribly profligate. Arsenal played well and took their chances but, significantly, we did not. For all of our pinging approach play there is still a lack of focus in some of the players, they should be up for this kind of game but some seemed to be going through the motions. Neville and VDS are more liabilities than dependable at the moment and we are going through a defensive transition. The great positive was the performance of Rafael, he has certainly earned a starting place in the next game and looks very assured. No complaints and not the end of the world, but not really good enough either.
Footnote:
Apologies for no fan’s view last week. A collective doffing of caps from the United support to Hull. You are a bloody good team, please finish above City.

As is widely reported, no hunters from the West of Bromich have returned from Manchester with a victory since the tricerotops roamed through Salford. Of course, one of our match going team was there in that cold December in 1958 and the memory of it still haunts him. So our hopes of a high scoring victory were doused with trepidation before kick-off as he portended doom in the usual fashion.

Fortunately, Wayne Rooney also disagreed with his cynicism and set about the travelling team like a caveman against a wounded sabre-tooth tiger. Rooney is in form at the moment, but he has always gone on little runs like this – there was a similar one last year kicked off by a hat-trick against Bolton – but because he is also doing it for England there is now hullaballoo involved.

The team is still not clicking in scat fashion yet so immense performances from individuals will have to see us through for the time being. I think we are getting there but there is definitely something missing at the moment. I hate to say it but we look like a cup team this year, let’s hope it is the big one. We will live to rue our results at Stamford Bridge and Anfield I fear, the Chelsea juggernaut rolls on and, horrifically, Liverpool are gaining in both momentum and belief.

Doom was portended by our companion for this solitary fixture, but the season at large could cause tears unless those two rivals start slipping up. It is going to be a long 7 months.

We have to view this as a huge missed opportunity. I think anybody who is honest was not confident before the game and even less so when the teams were announced. How wrong we were. The build up for our goal was first class but it is a damn shame that with a squillion pounds worth of strikers we only had one bullet in the chamber. Chelsea came back as Chelsea do and we looked a little out muscled in the second half, is Rio our biggest tough guy at the moment? It is hard not to think that with either Vidic or VDS on the field we might have defended better for their equaliser. This is far from a tragedy, but we should have won. Bringing on O’Shea was the move that lost us the points. No offence John.

This was decidedly middle-notch entertainment. In fact, the most interesting part of the evening was trying to decipher the team selection. There were bound to be changes made after Anfield and Fergie must be bricking it about central defence for the Chelsea game.

Johnny ‘no means no’ Evans played okay, and whilst he couldn’t quite keep our defensive areas completed zipped up, he did manage to penetrate the Villareal box against its wishes and nearly scored at the end. Gary Neville is starting to remind me of the original version of the King Kong movie, brilliant in its time but painfully dated now. He needs a major restoration and he may well not be the man to try and stop Joe cole and Bang/Crash/Whallop Drogba on Sunday. I would play Wes at right back and John O’Shea at centre back in the vain hope that he utilises some of that luck his countrymen are famous for.

The mysteries of the midfield continue. Was Fergie punishing the central players for last week’s result? Or was this too, another dry run for Sunday’s outing at the bridge? Or do we simply have no idea who are the first choices in that area? I always like the look of Hargreaves and when he is fit he should play, other than that it is hard to choose, for the most part we will need grafters on Sunday.

Villareal played a very nice, neat passing game. When they got possession they held possession and seemed a very organised team. This result is no tragedy but we are far from in form at the moment.
We are not in trouble in Europe, yet, and Fergie will know his midfield and defence for the weekend now he has had this little experiment. The thing that nobody seems to mention is that, frankly, it is time to drop Rooney.

You should always approach a match against the second best team in La Liga with a fair amount of caution. But it pays to know that last season was one of the weakest in that competition’s history, with champions Real Madrid losing 9 games from the start of the year alone. United are looking a touch dicey at the moment and small mercy it may be, but I am glad this game is being played at Old Trafford.

Our record at home in Europe is very, very strong (hang on a second, isn’t that what you said about our record against Liverpool?)(SHUT UP!) and the team hasn’t put two poor performances together since, well, since the last two games they played.

Also, Berbatov appears to be injured, Spartacus is only just returning from injury and volleyball Scholes is suspended. This bears all of the hallmarks of an upset (that means us losing) but for some reason I think we are going to win. Why? Because it is Europe, and that is surely the reason Fergie is still there.

Or perhaps there is something in my coffee.

Perhaps somebody should send out a memo at Old Trafford. The memo should read along the following lines:

“Competitive matches for Manchester United Football Club began four weeks ago, maybe the playing staff could start competing now.”

Alas, United have somehow managed to drag the lacklustre performance seen recently in the millionaire’s playground of Monaco into the urban wasteland of Liverpool. The Super Cup Final was, well, a cup final and we looked like we couldn’t be bothered. Games against Liverpool are bigger than cup finals and, again, our motivation was sorely lacking.

Despite recent form, and our decent record against them, if a Manchester United team steps out at Anfield giving anything less than 150% they are going to be beaten.

By starting with Tevez, Rooney and Berbatov we were left with no wingers and therefore no width and service for the guys up front. It looked to be working after three minutes as the new man danced down the right to set up Tevez. But after that it all started to go wrong, poor Rooney was everywhere achieving nothing again and we didn’t even have somebody to take the corners. Anderson’s two attempts could find their way into a textbook on backpassing.

So the formation didn’t really work and our pingy passing game was further unsettled by Liverpool’s energy and hustling. Then we lost control of the midfield and the second half comes close to embarrassing. I struggle to remember anything from that second period that comes close to resembling a good move. Giggs showed enduring class with his reactionary volley but that was about it. You always know it’s not going to be your day when someone gets sent off in the last minute through frustration and now we are missing an important player to suspension.

To put it mildly the players need a major rollicking and you can expect Kuscak and Neville to start against Chelsea whilst VDS and Brown find themselves in Trafford General Hospital having their eardrums reattached.

With Chelsea and Arsenal registering wholesome victories nearby we are the only ‘big gun’ not to have recorded a sizeable win yet. Horribly, Liverpool were good value for this victory. Not to worry, the next game is at Stamford Bridge, we’re sure to win 6-0 there.

The goatee beard arrived at the press conference and was followed in by Rafael Benitez. The beard announced that Torres and Gerard had both come through ‘light training’ and would be in the squad tomorrow. As far as smokescreens go I am sure that the organisers of the latest Kylie Minogue concert are quaking in their boots.

Having just spoken to my ‘friend’, a man more scouse than a twelve stretch for stealing the hubcaps off a glue sniffing factory, I can inform you that the watch grabbers are quietly confident, if for no other reason than it is about time. Being a superstitious old fool I have similar thoughts but never mind.
To the team sheet!

VDS
(Anelka)

Wes Rio Vidic Evra
(Not Gary yet) (Lets hope the back is okay) (Veni, vidi) (Groundsmen)

Hargreaves
(90 minutes please)

Nani Scholes Giggs
(new Ronaldo) (volleyball) (Chest wig)

Rooney
(articulate)

Berbatov
(goalscorer?)